Pope Vader

Henry the Vacuum vs. R2D2

For those of you who work in the restaurant industry, this commercial will make you laugh.

Hilarious Video

Oh this just makes me laugh...

Jedi Jesus

I saw this picture the other day and it made me laugh.  When I did a search for it, I came up with even funnier Jesus/Jedi pictures.  Here are a few of my favorites.

Go To Church People!

I might be inclined to go to church if there were Star Destroyers sitting above.  Or at least, I might go nearby and watch to see if they start firing on the parishioners...

Picture comes from Cory Doctorow.

More Star Wars Insanity

I realize my last post was about Star Wars, but blame SpikeTV--they are showing the originals today.  Anyways, I just watched one of my favorite parts, the above video includes the part where Vader chokes the nonbeliever.  It then got me thinking...

-Everything Obi-Wan tells Luke is basically a lie.  I know, he says that it is the truth from a certain point of view, but does this seem like good Jedi behavior?  When I met your father, he was already one of the best star pilots in the galaxy...ummm when you met his father, he was a little boy.  I highly doubt he was that great of a pilot.

-Your uncle did not want your father to get involved.  Uncle Owen did not really know Anakin, and he most certainly had no say whether Anakin was involved.

-Obi-Wan does not remember R2D2?  I guess senility is also a major Jedi trait.

-Vader's great speech about how the power to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of the Force.  Ummm, really?  Have we ever witnessed anything that would lead us to believe that the Force can do anything close to this?

-Obi-Wan says that he has not gone by that name since before Luke was born...did anyone at the end of Revenge of the Sith call him Ben?  I do not remember that.

-How shitty of a protocol droid is C-3PO?  I get that his mind must have been wiped a few times, but he does not know that Jawas are from Tatooine?

-In Return of the Jedi, Luke is escorted to the Emperor with handcuffs on.  The Emperor then releases them with the Force.  Why would they even bother putting them on a Jedi?

-Also, when the Emperor is taunting Luke by saying that he should just reach out and take the lightsaber and strike him down, why doesn't Luke just use the force to slowly turn it around and flip the switch on so it stabs the Emperor?  There are plenty of places in these films where we see Jedi use their power for something mundane (Obi-Wan is way too lazy to shut doors by hitting a button), but they fail to use it for something useful (why not use it to flip the off-switch on a lightsaber during a battle).  Am I the only one who thinks of this stuff?

Okay, I promise that I am done with this now.

Star Wars Stupidity

I am sitting here right now watching Star Wars Episode I:  The Phantom Menace on SpikeTV (I watched the last half of Episode III) and it occurred to me there are plenty of idiotic things about these films when compared to the originals.  I am sure people have pointed these things out before or found explanations, but it is still fun to make fun.

-If you are trying to hide Anakin Skywalker's children, why would you take one of them to Tattooine:  the place where Anakin was born?

-Also, why the hell would you keep his last name as Skywalker?  Did Luke ever have to register his T-16?  I am sure the Imperial DMV would have Skywalker on file.  Darth Vader and the Emperor did not keep a search program running to alert them if that name ever came up?

-Why does the Emperor refer to Luke as the son of Skywalker when talking to Vader?  Why not just say "your son cannot become a Jedi."  I guess that would have killed the big shock ending.

-Allow me to get this straight, Yoda and Obi-Wan escape from the Emperor and Vader and go into hiding.  What was their master plan?  Never train either child and just hope that the two bad guys die of old age?  Why not move to the farthest corner of the galaxy (I am guessing Tattoine) and train both of them both to be Jedi Knights.  Also, why wouldn't they both be out searching for other surviving Jedi?  Instead they just wait for them all to be killed or later hunted down by Vader.  Great plan.

One of my favorite posters from the prequels

-How does Princess Leia tell Luke that she remembers her mother as being very sad.  Padme dies when they are born.  Sorry, she loses the will to live.  Apparently that is a diagnosis in that universe.  I wonder what House would say?  He would definitely want an autopsy.

-Yoda and Chewbacca were good friends.  I somehow find it hard to believe that Luke and Chewie never have that discussion.  I am sure that Han would ask Luke where he learned how to be so badass and Luke would be like "oh, this old Jedi Master, Yoda trained me."  Or could Han have mentioned the weird ramblings from Luke to Chewie after Hoth?  I am almost certain one of these conversations had to happen.  Maybe Luke and Chewie once drank some beers and lamented over their dead friend.

-I always forget that Anakin is like Jesus.  He has no human father.  Quite creepy.  I wonder what Jesus' midichlorian count would have been?

A Second Video!

I saw this video over at filmdrunk the other day.  I saw it before somewhere and both sites make fun of Jake Lloyd for coming off as awkward.  To me, he seems more annoyed with the interviewer than anything.  Asking if he uses his role as Anakin to get girls?  If he still has any of the merchandise?

The funny thing to me is that people would be making fun of him if he was still clinging to that aspect of his life.  If his house was packed full of little Anakin figures everywhere, he would be a bit creepy.  Instead he says that he is finishing school and wants to be a film editor.  Good for him.  I can understand why he would be hesitant to do an interview after the way everyone made fun of his acting in Episode I.



I promise this will be the last video of the day.  I may even put up a GOTW...

My Birthday

It's been a few days since my birthday and I guess that means I should write about the adventures of the day.  I had a great day.  It started off with my mom, Adam, and Lora all going over to State College to enjoy a movie.  We went to see The Social Network.  This is significant because it was the first time my mom had been to a movie since 1999 (she went to see Star Wars Episode I with Adam and I).

I really enjoyed the movie.  It was very good, especially when you consider the subject matter:  the creation of Facebook.  I find it funny that so many people think that Mark Zuckerberg was portrayed as a jerk.  I wonder what that says about me?  It is the type of movie that I would have no problem watching again on HBO, but I would never go out and buy it.  Know what I mean?

After the movie we went over to Champs for dinner.  I had the always delicious Cajun Chicken Cheese Steak and a few Peroni's.  I had never tried Peroni and I really liked it.  Who knew Italian beer was any good?  When the waitress (I think her name was Stacy, so that was what we shall call her) asked for my ID, we had a fun exchange.

Me:  Today is my birthday (as I look for my ID)
Stacy:  Oh?  How old are you?
Me:  I just turned 21.
Stacy:  Really?  Like last night, or tonight at midnight?
Me:  Ten minutes ago.  That was the exact time of my birth.
Stacy (now looking at my ID):  That is really cool!  Did you go out?
Me (taking my ID back):  Did you actually look at my ID?
Stacy:  No, I just looked to see if it was vertical or horizontal.  Haha.
Me:  Here, look again.
Stacy:  Oh, hahahaha. (clearly confused)
Me:  You are the worst ID checker ever.  I am 30.
Stacy:  Oh, (now looking at in depth).  OH, HA!

She flirted with me a bit more (yeah, I have a girlfriend, but flirting with a waitress is a wise thing) and at the end of meal, she brings me out a cake.  I tried to get her to sing happy birthday.  She then brings the check.  She did not charge me for my meal or for my first beer.  I had no idea that Champs had that policy, she could have just said I got a free beer or something.  Hell, the free cake was a nice touch.  She definitely went above and beyond to make my birthday feel special.

After that we went to my mom's house to watch the Penn State game.  I do not want to talk about how great it was to watch PSU beat the crap out of Iowa how shitty it was to watch PSU get beat down by Iowa.  After the game, a few of us went out to the Pub.  That is when things go way downhill.

My girlfriend was supposed to meet us there after work.  By the time she got there, I was in full on blackout mode.  I have one memory of how I got there.  Tommy (a bartender from another bar) bought me a shot.  I am pretty sure it was a Three Wisemen.  I do not like whiskey at all.  As soon as I drank it, I could feel it hitting me.

When my girlfriend did finally arrive, I was a wreck.  Adam and Lora convinced her to take me home.  I went to bed and I guess in the middle of the night I woke up and decided to pee in my garbage can.  Is there anything to really say about the night?  Obviously it is a great night when you pee in a garbage can.

I also received some great gifts:
-Money
-Pirates hat (from Lora), which was too big, but I exchanged it for the correct size.
-Penn State shirt (from Adam), I have a degree from the school and yet almost no clothes from there.
-Superman/Batman:  Apocalypse DVD (Adam again)
-Batman Silly Bands (Adam)
-Comic Books (Kacie)
-Pens tickets (Mystery girlfriend)
-I Love Jesus shot glass (Lora)...I really wish I would have taken that shot with this glass.  I bet I would not have blacked out.
-Family Guy DVD (Adam)...apparently it was a banned episode.  I may watch it tonight.

Thank you to everyone who made turning 30 such a great time!

I am an Uber-Nerd

This video claims to be every lightsaber ignition in the Star Wars movies?  I can think of a few that it missed just sitting here thinking back on the originals:  Vader and Luke's battle in the cave (granted it was just a vision of Vader, but it felt real to us...)


My first thought was of Vader when he first meets Obi-Wan on the Death Star, but Vader's lightsaber is already ignited (waste of batteries dude).  What about in Empire when Han uses the lightsaber to cut open the Tauntaun?  Or what about when Luke uses it to kill the ice monster?  Those are just a few I can think of off the top of my head.  Very sloppy work.

Pretty Funny

This video is long, but it is definitely worth it.  Darth Vader's scenes redubbed with James Earl Jones lines from other movies.  It is hilarious how some of them fit quite well.  Or how silly some of them can be.  Trust me and watch it.  You will not be disappointed.

I Cannot Believe I Never Posted This Video

Yes, that is the title.  Get over it.  Anyways, enjoy my favorite Robot Chicken video of all time.



Also, if you noticed, I put up a FAQ page.  It makes me laugh, so hopefully it will make you laugh.  I am also accepting more questions to answer.

This is It Exactly

Watch this girl recap the Star Wars trilogy, even though she has not really seen all of it. Very funny.


Star Wars: Retold (by someone who hasn't seen it) from Joe Nicolosi on Vimeo.

Very Funny

Seriously, just watch it and laugh like I did.