After Big Whiskey...

This is something new I plan on doing every so often.  I will take a movie and write about where they are nowadays.  No, not the actual actors, but the characters.  My blog, my idiotic ideas.

Unforgiven
One of my all-time favorite movies.  I think most of you know the premise, well I was wondering what happened after that night at Greely's Bar.  Time for some hard-hitting investigative journalism...or a bunch of made-up stuff.

William Munny
He moved his kids out to San Francisco, where they did very well in dried goods.  Whatever the hell that means.  He actually ran into Wyatt Earp in 1902.  Earp knew exactly who Munny was, but unfortunately, the two men were way too old to get into anything.  Earp just let Munny go and they spoke about the fates of a bunch of lawmen and villains they both knew.

Munny died in 1905, at the age of 92.  After that night in Big Whiskey, he never touched alcohol again and he never killed anyone again.

Schoefield Kid
He got those spectacles and never had to worry about not being able to see.  The funny thing was that with those glasses, he was actually a remarkable shot, but he became a devout Catholic and never even raised his hand against another man.

Remember Little Sue?  Well after everything happened, she left Big Whiskey and on her way east, she actually ran into the Schoefield Kid.  They traveled together and eventually got married.  They moved to Boston, where the Kid (going by Trevor Darrow) practiced law for nearly fifty years. 


Trevor and Sue had three kids and lived happily ever after.

English Bob
Things did not go so well for English Bob.  After the beating he took from Little Bill, he decided to return to England.

Unfortunately, he was not well liked in England either.  In fact, the whole reason he was in America to begin with:  he was wanted for murder.  Yeah, he shot a guy in the back when he was 17 years old and fled to America.

Needless to say, someone recognized him and turned him over to Scotland Yard (it is rumored that the man who arrested him was Inspector Lestrade with help from someone in the private sector).  English Bob was then executed after a very quick trial.  The family of the murdered man was quite pleased.

Delilah Fitzgerald
The whore who was cut up.  She actually was inspired by the kind words of William Munny and decided to step-up and do something with her life.  With Little Bill dead, there was a void in the county's power structure.

She decided to fill that void.  No, she did not become the new sheriff.  Instead she ran for mayor of Big Whiskey and actually won.  People feared that Munny would return if they went against her.  She was the first female mayor in Wyoming history.

She was also a major player in the Women's Suffrage Movement.

Charley Hecker
He was the only deputy to survive Will's rampage.  After the whole thing ended, he was the new sheriff of Big Whiskey.  Until the following election in November.

Oddly enough though, he won the election.  He did things differently than Little Bill.  He and newly elected mayor Delilah decided to outlaw prostitution, which helped reduce crime.  Also, it helped to reduce the population, since the 12 prostitutes decided to move elsewhere.

He died in a gunfight about eight years later.

W.W. Beauchamp
He continued his travels looking for folks to interview.  He made his way up to South Dakota and ended up finding a place that kept him frozen in time.  He was later thawed out and given a job at a warehouse.

William Munny Jr.
Will sent both of his children to school in San Francisco.  Will Jr. eventually went to school back east and received a degree from Yale.  He returned to San Francisco and took over his father's business.  Within a few years he turned into the largest import/export companies on the west coast.

He eventually became the third richest man in America.  His company became one of the first multinational conglomerates.  He ended up having a falling out with some of his Skull & Bones friends and decided to stop giving money to Yale. 

He helped fund a new school in the west coast:  Stanford.  That is why, to this day, the Stanford library is known as the Billy Munny Library. 

One of the things he did purchase was a giant pig farm, where he visited once a year and rumor has it, delighted in watching those damned pigs get slaughtered...

After the Darkness

This is something new I plan on doing every so often.  I will take a movie and write about where they are nowadays.  No, not the actual actors, but the characters.  My blog, my idiotic ideas.

The Ghost and the Darkness
This is one of those movies I had not watched in years, I used to own it on VHS, but it never survived the conversion to DVD.  It was on HBO the other night and I had forgotten how good it was.  Let us take a look at what the survivors did after their battle with lions.

Colonel John Patterson
The man who killed the lion that ate his friend.  He finished construction of the bridge and moved back to England.  He ended up having three kids and he took them all over the world on hunting trips.


You may wonder where he got the money he would need to become a world famous hunter.  Well, in 1901 he opened a delicatessen in London, after a few years he had them all over England and even expanded into the United States.  Patterson and Sons Deli.  Even though when he opened it, he only had one infant son, he figured the name sounded like it was more established.


The unfortunate side of owning a deli, is eating all the meat.  John eventually became very fat and died of a heart attack.  His sons later sold the family business.

Robert Beaumont
The jerk who sends Patterson there with the mission to build the bridge.  Beaumont only had one goal:  to be knighted.  Well he never actually achieved that goal.  In fact, he was later murdered in his sleep by his new foreman.

His name was forgotten very quickly.  Men like him need to remember that being assholes does not get you very far.  It usually gets you a nice knife in the back.

Samuel
After the bridge was completed, this man was sent by the British Empire all over the continent of Africa helping complete projects.  He became known as a great man of peace and of always being able to get the job done.

He later retired and became a huge speaker on Africa becoming a unified nation.  Even though he liked his job with the British, he wanted to see his countrymen united and controlling their own destiny.  He looked at the United States as a great example of how powerful a land can become when their people are one.

He never liked any of his wives, even though he took two more.  He died at the age of 94. 

Abdullah
The shifty Arab worker who blamed Patterson for the lions.  He later moved back to Jordan and helped lead a revolt against the British government there.  He helped expel the British troops and he set himself up as the King of Jordan.

He ruled for 22 years before a coup d'etat ousted him from government.  Oddly enough, he was replaced by another Abdullah, whose family still rules the country to this day.

Charles Remington
The world famous hunter, who was killed by the lion after he killed it's brother.  The man was the heir to the Remington gun fortune.  He had hunted everywhere in the world.  You name an animal, and he probably killed it.  Minus the platypus, he was deathly afraid of those freaky bastards. 

After being eaten, the lion most likely would have taken a nap and began digesting it's kill.  Remington would then have ended up as this:

Before people go crazy and inform me that I have my history wrong, yes I am quite aware of this.  In fact, if you want to read something interesting, read about the real John Patterson.

After the Trial

This is something new I plan on doing every so often.  I will take a movie and write about where they are nowadays.  No, not the actual actors, but the characters.  My blog, my idiotic ideas.

Primal Fear
I really like this movie.  I do not think there are many people out there who can say they actually foresaw the ending.  What do you think those characters have been up to since that trial?  Let us take a look.

Martin Vail
Poor Marty:  he realizes too late that there is no multiple personality disorder, and that Aaron is just a psychopath who murdered the Bishop (and Linda, the girl from the video) and will eventually be released from a mental hospital and be free to kill again.

At first things went okay for Martin, he and Janet got together and she eventually became a partner at his firm.  As time went on, he continued to think about Aaron and constantly monitored his whereabouts.  He even went so far as visiting a city where Aaron was living and going to the police off the record about Aaron.  Unfortunately, Aaron found out about it and sued Martin.  This caused Martin to be disbarred.  He now writes crime novels and is an alcoholic.

Janet Venable
Since she lost her job with the District Attorney's office, she ended up going to work with Martin.  They eventually started dating again and he made her a partner in his firm.  Once he became obsessed with Aaron, she dumped him and focused on expanding the firm.  She brought in more attorneys and it quickly became one of the biggest firms in Chicago.

Once Martin was disbarred, she took over the firm completely and eventually brought in two more partners.  She is currently living in Hawaii.  She no longer practices, but is still a senior partner.  Occasionally she pops into the office to basically scare the crap out of everyone.  She is considered a legend in Chicago legal circles.

Aaron Stampler
He spent his time in the mental hospital, getting treated for multiple personality disorder.  He took the drugs they prescribed and after about six months the doctors decided he was getting better and released him.  The court put him on probation for the next three years and said he was not allowed to leave the city without permission.

After his probation ended he decided to move to Boston.  This is the point when Martin started following Aaron because he believed he would kill again.  Aaron quickly realized something was amiss and filed charges against Martin for harassment.  He then learned that Martin disclosed information about him that violated the attorney-client privilege.

Aaron stayed in Boston for a few years, but he knew that he would not be able to kill in the city.  The police kept an eye on him.  Apparently they believed Martin and did not like anyone who could kill a Catholic Bishop, even if he was a sexual deviant.  Hell, Boston is full of pervert priests, does not mean people should go around killing them, right?

Anyways, Aaron decided to move west, out to Seattle.  Martin never knew about the move and the police did not care once he was outside of the city.  He soon began murdering people in the city.  This time though, he did not get caught.  Unfortunately, his reign of terror did not last long.  He died of a brain aneurysm in '09.  Martin Vail does not know this.

Goodman/Naomi

These two decided to quit working for Martin once Janet came into the picture.  They did not like the way she wanted to do things.  They formed a private investigation firm and still did plenty of work for Vail & Venable, but at a much steeper rate.

They started dating and eventually got married.  They are happily married to this day.  They have three kids.  Martin eventually tasked them with keeping tabs on Aaron, which they refused.  Goodman is still friends with Vail, but does not indulge in his fantasies.

Naomi never believed Marty about Aaron and continuously drifted further away from him.  She eventually became friends with Janet and helped her win some very high profile cases.

Shaughnessy

The dickhead District Attorney, who had a little business venture with the Bishop that turned south when the Bishop decided to start caring about inner-city folks losing their homes.  He continued to make shady business deals and finally got caught.  He ended up losing his job and decided to take his own life (instead of being killed by the shady businessmen he owed money to).  Martin peed on his grave once during a drunken night.






Bud Yancy

This guy ended up on a flight from Sydney to Los Angeles...

After the Moon Tower...

This is something new I plan on doing every so often.  I will take a movie and write about where they are nowadays.  No, not the actual actors, but the characters.  My blog, my idiotic ideas.

Dazed and Confused
As many of you know, this is one of my favorite movies.  I can probably quote the entire movie.  I always loved how the movie's high point is the party at the moon tower and the different things that happen to the characters.  It was one of those things where the movie leads us to believe that this is the kind of night that will change their lives.  Do parties out in a field usually have a major impact on our lives?  I bet not and let us take a look and see what those crazy kids got into after the party.

Randall "Pink" Floyd
Everyone kept trying to get Pink to sign the pledge sheet so he could play football next year.  He tells his coach that he may play football, but he will never sign that sheet of paper.  Well believe it or not, he did play football his senior year.  Lee High School had a very good returning team and they finished the season 10-1.  They lost in the semifinals of the state playoffs.  Just one game away from playing for the state title.  It was a heart-breaking loss.  This winning caused Pink to fall back in love with football.  He went to a small, D-II school in Texas where he played for four years, started his junior and senior years.  He received his degree and later returned to Lee High School to teach.  He became the football coach once his former assistant coach (who became the head coach when Coach Conrad retired) was fired for having an affair with Ms. Stroud.  Randy has led his team to three state titles and has been recruited to coach for a few colleges.  He turns them down because he truly loves the thrill of coaching kids who still have a passion for football.  He does not make kids sign any kind of pledge.

Mitch Kramer
Mitch was quickly accepted by the seniors and became the cool guy for the freshmen.  It also did not hurt that he had a wicked fastball.  He started for Lee High School as a freshman and won a couple games.  He pitched all four years and ended up accumulating some impressive stats.  He was drafted by the Kansas City Royals in the 8th round of the 1980 draft.  He made it up to the AA level before panning out.  He decided to stay in Arkansas, where he still lives with his wife and two kids.  He works as a plant manager at a chicken factory.  He cut his hair after his sophomore year because it got in his way as a pitcher.  I guess he never watched Tim Lincecum...

Ron Slater
The hippy of the group.  He spent the majority of the party doing drugs or talking about George Washington being in a cult and how he grew weed because it was a good cash crop.  Slater's story is not all that good, nor is it all that bad.  He pretty much quit doing drugs after his freshman year of college.  Apparently he did so many drugs that they started to have no effect on him after awhile.  He did not want to graduate into the really hard drugs, so he just gave it all up.  Fortunately, he saved enough money from selling drugs to pay for college.  He decided to apply himself and ended up getting his masters degree in harmonics.  He works for some company designing speakers.  His biggest regret in life was not getting his PhD.  Also, he never did bang a lot of chicks, but the one he did nab in college was considered one of the hottest girls on campus.  You may have seen her as the Playmate of the Year (1978)...

Benny O'Donnell
Believe it or not, but Benny was actually a very smart kid.  He may have seemed like all he cared about was football and getting Pink to play, but in truth he was quite more than just an all-state linebacker.  He was probably one of the best linebackers in all of Texas and he was offered a full ride to the University of Texas, Texas Tech, and even Alabama, but he turned them all down.  He decided to join a much bigger team, with a much grander tradition.  He joined the Army, well actually he went to West Point.  After graduating, he moved up the ranks quickly and joined a new covert ops unit called Delta Force.  He went on to becoming one of the trainers for future agents.  He retired from the military in 2001 (after a disagreement with Rumsfeld) as a Lieutenant General.  One of his prized recruits into the Delta Force program was a young soldier who would later go on to fight terrorists for CTU in Los Angeles.  Benny now resides in Texas on his cattle ranch, there has been speculation about him running for the state Senate.

David Wooderson
Wooderson never did go to junior college.  He kept working for the state and partying with high school kids.  Unfortunately, like most old guys who forget to grow up, he went from being cool to creepy in just four years.  By Mitch's senior year, Wooderson was now the weird old guy at a party.  I mean, 16 year old girls do not think a 30 year old stoner is all that sexy.  After Mitch graduated, he no longer had an in with the high school crowd.  He started leaving work and just heading to the local bar and drinking until about 10:00, then he would go home and get some sleep and do it all over again.  We have seen those guys at the bar, they look like they have been there all day, still dressed in their dirty work clothes, and then when it starts getting crowded, they bolt.  He quickly put on weight and lost his hair.  He died of a heart attack in 2004.  I guess he was no longer L-I-V-I-N.

Darla Marks
What a freakin' bitch!  She always thought she was the queen of her high school.  She became a stewardess for United Airlines after high school.  She married a business man and together they had three kids.  She is one of those mothers who pushed her daughters into becoming cheerleaders.  Always pushing them, harder and harder.  Telling them they need to diet.  They grew up hating her and have not spoken to her in thirty years.  She has never met her grandchildren.  It is actually kind of sad.  She is miserable and wonders if she should have been a better person when she was younger.

Jodi Kramer
Mitch's older sister did not have the cool story as her brother (I guess that depends on your POV).  She continued to try and get Pink to dump Simone, but to no avail.  She ended up sleeping with lots of guys and by the time she reached college, she was banging multiple partners a night.  She dropped out of college and started doing porn to pay the bills.  She is best known for her role in Gangbang Nurses VII (which was not nearly as good as Gangbang Nurses VI, but that is another debate for another time).   She had to retire from porn after her second prolapse.  So disgusting.

Don Dawson
Premature ejaculator my ass!  Guess who became a daddy???  That's right, Don impregnated Shavonne (luckily she had the kid during the summer after graduation).  They got married and then divorced three years later when he got another girl pregnant.  Apparently he has super sperm.  He has at least six other children.  I am pretty sure that child support laws were created because of him.  A few more kids and he could have fielded his own football team (at least an offense).

Fred O'Bannion
The dumbshit failed his senior year.  Unfortunately he did not have much of a chance to attend classes in 1977.  During the summer he stewed over how angry he was about that skinny little shit Carl.  He ended up basically stalking him all summer and then one drunken night, he finally caught him and beat him.  He broke Carl's legs and his jaw.  Needless to say, the police did not think it was all that funny.  He was arrested and ended up doing seven years in prison, where he most certainly became someone's bitch.  Because of the beating on Carl, Lee High School made a huge push to stop hazing.  Carl became the poster boy for what happens when hazing goes too far.  Mitch and his friends did not haze the incoming freshmen...

These last two individuals actually had their lives changed from that party...

Clint Bruno and Mike Newhouse
He only came to the Moon Tower for two things:  to kick some ass and drink some beers.  And did he ever kick poor, nerdy Mike's ass.   That was probably the biggest mistake of Clint's life.  Mike decided to go to college and study his butt off.  He went on to law school and soon after got a job as an assistant district attorney. 

Clint stayed in town and got a job as a mechanic.  He would occasionally get into bar fights and get into trouble.  Mike made it his life mission to destroy Clint.  He moved back to that area and after one of those fights, Mike pushed to have Clint given the maximum jail time.  He then paid a guy to shank Clint in prison.  Not a lethal shank, just one that left Clint paralyzed.  Mike later visited Clint in the hospital and asked him once again if he remembered him.  To this day, he sends Clint a card on the day of the shanking and signs it "Isaac Fuckin' Newton."

Mike now serves on the Texas Supreme Court.  And he might be a serial killer, not really all that sure.